DFC #141 |
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Image © 1998 Bil Keane, Inc. Distributed by Cowles Synd., Inc. |
No, really, will y'all marry me? Ah know it's a little illegal, but Mommy an' Daddy did it, and *they* were jus' cousins... --Munchie Munchie
This bouquet is apallin' !! A-pollen! Get it?? God, Jeffy -- sometimes you have all the humorous uptake of Grandpa's rotting gonads!--Vice Pope Doug
Here, Jeffy. Breathe in these spores. I saw Mr. Spock do this once and he really enjoyed it.--El Kabong
Stop staring, Jeffy. They always strip down to their shorts and sit on the couch like that. Keep this up an' we're never bringin' you to Outland again!--Riff
Oh, give it up. He loves you not; he's just trying to get into your pants.--Gen, Sedgwick
Trust me on this. You mix a few of these in with the ragweed and she HAS to say "How pretty!" and get a vase. Me an' Billy kept her sneezing for WEEKS last fall.--Charlie Steinhice
It's a sure thing! We undercut those bald bastards at the airport, because we have NO overhead .... and we're a fuck of a lot cuter!!--Vice Pope Doug
No, it's the giant seed pods that replace you when you sleep. These are just triffids.--Charlie Steinhice
OK, this is an appropriate enough sign of grief for that guy Daddy hit with the minivan...--Keef
Let's see how funny Daddy thinks an oversized head is when he can't find his allergy medicine....--War Gerbil
See? And you said I was stupid to plant those meatballs last spring!--Imhotep
I * REALLY * gotta stop eatin' these things...Look at what the're doin' to my thighs fer crissake!--Doc Evil
Here, go give these to Mr. Chipmunk. Make it up to him. He'll come back.--Bongbrain
First they chop off our feet. Then they make us do YARDWORK! Frankly, I'd rather just be grounded.--ChoppingBlock
Here Jeffy, pull my flower. No, that's not it, how does that go again?--VitaminTom
Hare Krishna...Krishna Krishna...Flowers for Krishna?--anon
If they're the right kind, we'll float for hours in euphoric bliss. If they're the wrong kind, it's another hellish night with Mr. Stomach Pump.--Bongbrain
These are appropriate flowers to give a dried up, withered old hag on Mother's Day.--Bongbrain
...and the best part is, medical examiners almost never check for this type of poisoning.--Dave
You wanna get paid for pulling up this field of dandelions? Hell, we're lucky he's too drunk to stand out here with his whip!--Tazabby
Surely you recognize pansies, ya limp-wristed loser!--Don Spudleone
We gotta do this by hand until Daddy gets what's left of PJ outta the lawn mower!--anon
Jeffy, Jeffy, wherefore art thou, Jeffy ?... Thy melon head, thy lack of mouth .......--Vice Pope Doug
When the Keane kids re-enact The Odyssey, wackiness is sure to follow.--Thomas Wilde
C'mon, shake a leg!The landscapers will pay us $50 for each yard we infect!--Jessica Steinhice
Opium, Jeffy! Acres of opium poppies! Either we're rich, or we're about to be gunned down by cartel guards. Either way, we're out of this stinking strip!--Roy
Aren't these cu...hold on. Is it my imagination, or is the grass slowly devouring us?--Preacher/Judge
Okay, these three represent Dad, Mom, and that bitch Cathy. Whoosh! HA HA HA!! Watch 'em disentigrate! HA HA HA!!--Preacher/Judge
Look and learn, Jeffy. Only the RED poppies. Grandma will kick your ass all over the house if you bring in those low grade yellow ones.--ninailer
Submitted for your approval: You an' me, standing in a meadow, playing with a certain type of plant ... a weed, if you will. You have just entered ... the Difficult Zone.--tv's Spatch
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